Thursday, December 03, 2009

All my mother's dreams came true at Wal Mart this morning

My momma used to say "I hope you have a kid just like you." And guess what, I do.

One example: Here in Austin we are facing The Blizzard of Death'09 ®.

Weather is supposed to stay in the mid to high 30s tonight, tomorrow and much of Saturday. To prevent frostbite, instant hypothermia and projectile vomiting, the weather forecasters are suggesting that we Texans wear coats during this half-week Ice Age.

So we went about digging out the "big coats" this morning. Yet, The Talker's was nowhere to be found. He has worn the same big coat for a year, maybe two. It is one of those layered systems that you can separate into a lightweight jacket and a thicker polar fleece sweater. And amazingly he has managed to keep up with all of the component parts for this long.

The Princess has the same type of coat. And her's was missing for a few minutes too, but it was found in the trunk of my car. But she is a stylish girl and she had a spare, fuzzy fake fur Wookie looking coat lying around.

Anyways, I don't really want the kid to freeze to death. Plus, I simply don't have time to deal with Child Protective Services coming to my house, so I figured we needed to replace the boy's coat. this morning I hit up Target and a couple of other stores. No dice. Either the jackets were too thin, too bulky or too money. (I don't really need the boy to wear a faux-fur trimmed, goose down, parka for this 3 day winter storm.) I even stopped at a resale shop or two. Still no coat for the kid.

I was heading to the mall, when I saw the sign for our nearest Wal Mart. I'll admit, even though I worked for an arm of the giant for a few years in college, I don't really like Wal Marts. They are simply too big for my taste and my usual experience is that they are messy. But this store has recently been remodeled, so I am not as afraid of it as I once was.

Less than 15 minutes after I parked the car, I was walking out with the most perfect, $13 boy's coat ever made in China. It isn't as fancy as the lost jacket, but it should last at least long as our frigid temps. Hopefully The Talker will keep up with it longer than just this weekend, though.

But if not, I now know where to go for a quick replacement.

The Talker is getting off easy. No lectures, no hassles. Just a new coat because all during this journey I kept wondering how many times my mother made a similar trek to buy me a coat and to keep me from freezing to death in a t-shirt. I would guess that she did it more than once while I was in elementary school.

So Mom, Thanks for the curse. I want you to know that it worked.

1 comment:

The Father of Five said...

HILARIOUS post Mike!

You had me laughing out loud (literally) a couple of times!!

Keep warm this weekend!