Monday, February 07, 2005

Lardbutts of the World, UNITE!

A lot of the guys I know who are stay-at-home-dads love the fact that once they started keeping up with kids, they shed some pounds. Not me. But, most of the other guys left desk jobs. I was chasing 25 kids around all day, now I chase 2. Also, around here it is like living in a concession stand. Snack time starts at 9am and runs until about 6pm. The Talker would be happy to snack all day and never eat a real meal. And The Princess likes her chow, too. And when in Rome...

When The Talker and I were home by ourselves, we walked. A lot. We live on the end of a cul-du-sac and one of our neighbors said it used to be like watching a two-man parade eight times a day, since we had to walk past her house twice on each trip. We actually wore out a couple of sets of tires on our jogging stroller. Without ever jogging.

But with The Princess and The Talker, I don't have the chance to get out on walks four or five times everyday. And he usually wants to walk , too. So we have to go S L O W L Y. Because the boy might miss seeing a rock or a bug or a flower or deer poop...

Only when we are heading to the park can I push the double jogging stroller fast enough to get any cardiovascular benefit. Then the boy is OK with getting in a hurry. But we don't go there very often anymore. The Princess like to eat the gravel at the playground. And I hate THE LOOK I get when The Boss Lady finds rocks in the diaper...

For several years, I have made fun of people for having a treadmill and only using it to hang-dry their laundry. Check with me in a few months and see if I have joined that crowd. Our new treadmill will be here in a week or two. The idea is that I can use it while the kids nap.

But if you ever see clothes drying on the new treadmill, please just give me a Twinkie, the TV remote and show me to the sofa. I might just be happier, over there.

2 comments:

Fucktard said...

he he he ... I am only a stay at home daddy on mondays ... I accualy work but on mondays our sitter dosent, AND I LOVE IT! I have a question ... Is the Hook dance the dance where the one arm and elbow kinda hook back and forth? If so My daughter does the same dance. Anyway, Im glad I ran across your blog.

Mike said...

Around here we do more of the Wags the Dog Dancing.

Gotta love The Wiggles. Because it is a crime to kill them. And the boy would cry.

http://www.thewiggles.com.au/about/friends/wags.html