Thursday, July 12, 2007

Your mom goes to college

That is one of the best lines from the best movie released since Bill and Ted got back from their Excellent Adventure. I'm talking Dynamite, people. Napoleon Dynamite.

But this post is not about the best Hollywood offers up. It is about honor and cheating. And high school algebra classes. And some would say chemistry classes but they would be wronger than hell.

See, it started like this. The Talker found a calculator that I had in college. It was a freebie from a conference. Nothing fancy, just a simple solar calculator. Except it is round. And that makes it interesting to the boy. Whatever. This post is not really about that calculator.

We were heading out to run some errands this morning and he wanted to take the round calculator along so he could "do some math work". I ran back inside to look for a second little calculator that used to be in the computer cabinet. It is nothing special either, except that it is bright orange. But this post is not about that calculator either. Which is fine because I could not find it anyways...

I did find a scientific calculator that I used in high school. So I gave that to the girl to keep her busy during our errands. The kids carried the calculators in when we went to eat lunch. I think they were running a numbers racket on the wait staff because they ended up eating for free...
While we were waiting for our food, I started laughing about the scientific calculator. I was showing The Boss Lady how I used to hide cheat sheets in the case to get through my high school Algebra II class. Yep, I cheated in high school. Good times.

Anyways, The Boss Lady claims that this is her calculator that she used in her high school chemistry class. And she is sure of it. Because she remembers hiding cheat sheets in the case to make it through her Chem I class. Yes, she is a cheater. Can you believe that? I am appalled.

The wife further remembers me borrowing this calculator and that wonderful, magical case, to "get through" a college Algebra class. But I never did pass that class, so I think I must have not been using that calculator properly...

OK, so that was a lot of back story to make this post get back to the title...

Anyways, at lunch, while my Chemistry-cheating wife was lying about the origins of MY calculator, we were passing the machine back and forth to try to convince the other tpassedhat it really was the machine we had used in high school. The Princess got fed up that "her" calculator was being passed around like a stolen math test.

Worn out from not getting to play her numbers, she finally yelled at both of us "It was mine when I was in college. Give it back!"

But now I am a little worried that she knows too well about the "special powers that this calculator possesses. So maybe we'll need to find her a different one before she hits high school.

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