This is a follow up to this morning's post about smoking a big fat one on my back porch.
200 degrees in the box. Time to open the top vents for a quality smoked brisket.
200 degrees in the yard. Time to open a cold one and find some nap quality shade.
This is hard work, cooking and napping at the same time. No wonder the guy at the BBQ place up the road gets $6 a sammich.
5 1/2 hours until dinner time. More updates later.
When I got home from fishing this weekend, empty handed, there was a present from The Mother of the Bride. A 9 pound brisket. Not 9 pounds of cooked brisket, but a big ol' slab of meat looking for a place to be cooked.
Since I eat about 10 pounds of brisket a month, I have been wanting to try my hand at cooking one myself, so I guess this was a sign from God and my mother in law that I should do it. I have been looking at barbecue smokers for a while now.
I was heading over to the sporting goods store to pick one up when I remembered a Christmas gift card from Home Depot in my wallet. So I brought home a box style Charcoal smoker. My neighbor has one like it and he is the master of pork ribs.
Took me a while to get it all unpacked and assembled. But it was fairly straight forward. Heck I managed not to break anything and I hadn't had any Dr Pepper in about 10 hours. Half an hour and I was trying to decide whether I would smoke the brisket in the backyard, by the new comfy chairs or in the morning shade of the front yard.
The backyard and comfortable chairs won out!
I left the brisket to sit in the rub for an hour or so.
My dinner meat met it's fate at 12:19 pm.
Smokin'!The Boss Lady will be off for her summer break in 9 and a half hours. 11 days of bonding with the kiddos and wondering where AtHomeDaddy is hiding. I'll give you a hint. Bet I won't be spotted in the kitchen. Or the laundry room.
Actually, we are quite possibly the most boring family in the entire history of the universe. During her time off we are making a trip up to Ft Worth this weekend and a couple of day trip to the coast, to catch all the fish I missed 2 days ago. In other words, the only exotic places we will see this summer are places that we have abeen in the past month to see people we have already seen this week.
But the kids SLEEP at both locations. And we have spent a lot of sleepless nights on road trips.
OK, The Boss has spent a lot of sleepless nights on road trips, trying to get the kids settled enough to sleep in a different bed. I usually find some way to catch a few Zzzzzzzzs. That is what allergy meds are for, right?
Instead we will will find lots of adventures around here. Lots of park and museum visits. Eating out at the finest Chich-Fil-A's and driving downtown to check out the arsonists work at the Texas Governor's mansion. All that fun stuff.
Maybe we will travel more than just to grandma's house when the kids sleep at night. Or when gas goes back down to a couple of bucks a gallon. Until then, the boring summers continue.
Just the way we like 'em.
JB, my old college roommate, and I met up in San Antonio on Friday night to eat some barbecue and to head down to Matagorda Bay to go fishing. Saturday turned out to be a great day of fishing and BSing. We didn't catch any whoppers, but we were in the fish all day.
After a full day of letting the fish eat our bait, we headed over to dinner at the world's slowest seafood restaurant in Matagorda. IF you ever want to go to River Bend, make sure you have an hour to wait for the appetizers and 2 hours to wait for your dinner. The food was great and the view ALMOST made up for the wait.
Good times at the bay. Makes for a great weekend. Even if you have to wait for dinner.
When the fishing gear takes up more room than the clothes. And most of the real fishing gear is in storage down at the coast. This is really just the bag I smuggle my cigars around in.
To be honest, I could have packed all of my clothes in a MUCH smaller bag, but this was the smallest I could scrounge up.
I'm out. Be at the house Sun night, we will grillsome fresh fish.
The wife and kids are staying in town this weekend. Someone has to keep the heat company. But me? I am headed for the coast. Nothing like a little salt water fishing to make the summer blues melt away.
It is likely too hot for the fish, too. But at least I will be 3 hours away when The Mother of the Bride comes to visit.
For. The. Entire. Weekend.
And besides, just because I go fishing for the weekend, does not mean I actually have to fish, does it?
While the kids were at swim lessons I met up with a neighbor and brought home her two boys. now there are 4 children from 3 to 9 years old in our house. I am seriously outnumbered!
The bouncer has already made it's debut,caused at least one round of crying and been deflated in favor of snack time in the air conditioning. The kids did manage to play outside until 11am, though. So I give them props for that. After all, it may only be 11, but it is already over 90 degrees.
In a less than an hour it will be hot enough outside to melt your face, so I guess we* will be playing inside from here on out. No sense in returning these extra kids with their faces melted off.
So I guess from here on out it is Legos, Star Wars on the PS2 and whatever fun I can find for this herd.
*we=they, since someone still has to go out into the blast furnace that is our backyard and fold the bouncer before it causes the grass to wilt. Wish me luck. But please don't hope that my face melts off.
On the way to swim lessons this morning, I spotted a Hyundai with that color shifting paint. As it was coming towards us, it looked hot pink. I pointed the pink car out to The Princess, but by the time it passed her window, it looked silver. I glanced in the rear view mirror a second later and it was driving off, looking mighty white.
The Princess was quiet sure did not see the pink car, so The Talker offered up his commentary about the pink/silver/white car:
"You know Sister, you don't seem many pink cars in our world. That is why they disguised it as a silver and white car. Maybe they are from California. Yep, that is a California car for sure."
Which is kind of funny, since I was sitting there thinking the same thing about Hyundai's with $10,000 paint jobs.
Back when the garden was looking promising, I had high hopes for a huge crop of potatoes. Not this year though.
I just pulled the vines up and harvested the last three potatoes of the year. That brings the grand total to six potatoes for the season. Not six pounds. Six 'taters. All smaller than a golf ball.
Harvesting six potatoes a season would still be worth the hassle, since they are soooooooo tasty and I loves them so much., except for one thing. I planted NINE potatoes to get six back, three months later. And the ones I planted in March were bigger.
Next season, potatoes go in the ground earlier. Valentine's Day, according to my dad. Ever the optimist in all things veggie gardening, now I can hardly wait until the Spring.
Until then, I guess I am looking at a long winter of store bought 'taters.
And some of us never master the growing up thing. I must fit into that group, as evidenced by my fabulous Father's Day gift from the kids. 
To the rest of you dads out there, I hope you bounce through today, too.
Today is The Boss Lady's first day off for the summer. Her break actually starts in a couple of weeks, but until then, she is off on Fridays.
Fridays are good.
Since The Boss Lady was terribly excited to drop the kids off at VBS this morning, I decided to let her so that I could get my car washed and cleaned out for our impending road trip. Plus, this way, I could hide from the VBS lady and not end up at the church all morning. After all, no one up there knows the wife, so surely they would not put her to work, right?
Plan worked perfectly. Kids dropped off, wife is packing clothes and my car is spotless. We will reach escape velocity in about 3 hours.
Fridays are good.
Yesterday was another day when my services were not required at Vacation Bible School. So I came home and took a nap.
There. I said it.
I took a nap at 9:45 in the morning. But all that is really important is that I made it back to pick the kids up ON TIME. Because napping past noon on a perfectly good weekday would have just been soooooo wrong.
When I was picking up the kids, a random mom asked me how old The Princess is.
"She is five.
Oh? She sure is petite.
Nope. She is bigger than most of her friends."
Five minutes after we left I realized that my daughter is bigger than most of her friends. Since they are 4.
And so is she.
You are hereby notified that AtHomeDaddy intends to pursue all reasonable recourse to protect his registered, copyrighted, and trademarked name, Death Fruit©®TM and all variations thereof.
Of course, if you want to use the name Death Fruit©®TM or Death Fruits©®TM, I can be bought at a reasonable price...
That is, unless you are starting a band. In that case I think I'll hang onto the name for my future recording career. AtHomeDaddy and The Death Fruit©®TM. Has a nice ring to it, no? Or maybe it'll be Death Fruit©®TM featuring AtHomeDaddy.
Something odd is going on out in the garden. And it isn't only my garden. The neighbor's veggie plot is doing the same thing. Nothing.
I have tons of tomatoes or - as the national news media wants you to believe - Death Fruits©®TM. And there are a couple of watermelon on the vine. Everything else is a wash this year and I am about to give up. 3 varieties of beans and most days I can't find a single bean to pick. Last year I was picking a pound or two each day. Worst of all, my potatoes never bloomed. Which means not 'taters under ground.
The Boss Lady ate some of the Death Fruit©®TM the other night and she did not die. So evidently not only can I not grow beans this summer, I can't even grow salmonella.
The kids are at Vacation Bible School this week. I am supposed to be there, too.
But this VBS is not at our church, it is at the church that hosts The Princess' pre-school. And it is being run by members of the church, who don't really know the legend of Mr Mike, the pre-school playground guy. Which may turn out great for me.
I checked in the kids this morning and looked around for anyone who might need my assistance. After I completed one task, there wasn't really anything else for me to do. I didn't want to stand around for a couple of hours, so I split.
But, this is the sad (and cheap) part, I couldn't think of anything more exciting to do than to run to the grocery store for cheap Dr Pepper, strawberries and chicken. Yep, I dropped my kids off for religious education and then I went and used my illegal, fictitious discount card at the other grocery store.
They had cases of Dr Pepper, 2 for$7. So that makes the lies and deceit OK, right?
But the point of this post (as if I need a point to post) is that it is sad that this was the best I could do with 2 and a half free hours.
Back when The Boss Lady and I bought our house, most of the backyard fence needed to be replaced. And some of it still does. One side had been recently replaced by the previous owners. Then the neighbor decided it was ugly, so she replaced that same fence 5 years later. Luckily, it was the longest side of our yard. But we knew the remaining fence would come smashing down on our dogs just any day.
So I set to make a few little repairs, to just bide some time, since we had just depleted our funds buying our first house.
Yeah, coat hanger wire. But it worked. That wire has been there for 9 years! And the fence never actually fell over.
No this isn't the one I built. Smart ass.
OK, those were actually from a couple of weeks ago, when The Princess and I were playing Beauty Shop.I am starting to think this family would qualify.
The Talker had one of his buddies come over for about 4 hours today. I usually try to distract the kiddos by bringing in a friend or two, so that I can clean the house.
But today? In four hours? Got the kitchen cleaned and vacuumed the living room rug. That is ALL!
I wasn't really loafing either. Between cooking lunch and fixing snacks for the herd, I scrubbed and scraped and washed everything I could get to.
Almost 4 hours to get our kitchen presentable? Yuck!
I spent about half my afternoon trying to track down a complete set of our new patio furniture. Of course, all the kids really wanted were the giant boxes. Box fort city will hopefully move into the backyard soon, but it is raining.
And for the record, here is a picture of the picture from the box of our new patio set. It is raining and I am too lazy to actually walk outside to take a photo of our new outdoor dining room.
Plus, the box has an umbrella and a pool, neither of which I found in any of the boxes. 
4 years ago I started blogging about the minutiae and trivial crap that I thought might interest The Queen Mother and The Mother of the Bride. After all, they were grandmas whose heirs were 200 miles away and in the trust of a STAY AT HOME DAD. Gasp Ack Barf...
4 years ago, I had time to blog 3 times a day. Naptime. Those were the days.
Now a days, I blog while the kids are otherwise distracted from actively trying to kill each other. And yet, I still find time for 3 or more entries a day....
But I never have strayed far from my original mission to bring news of the day to grandmas throughout Texas. Every bit of boring, stinky news I can make up remember.
It took Navin R. Johnson a while to figure out his purpose. But The Talker is well ahead of the game, as evidenced by this conversation that took place in our car 5 minutes ago.
"Son, please quit arm-farting. It is getting old.
Dad, did you know that my friend can leg-fart? He puts his hand behind his knee and just does it. But I was born to arm-fart!"
So there you have it. No need for us to save for a college education for this one. His future is secure.
A few weeks back I started up an old hobby. I am trying to beat the man at his own game. The grocery store man.
Back in college I used to clip coupons like a beast. I loved to get a cart full of STUFF and only pay a few pennies on the dollar for the whole load. But the downfall to shopping at the stores with double and triple coupons is that I would end up buying stuff that we didn't really need, just because it was ridiculously cheap. Stocked up on a lot of carpet deodorizer that way.
Now a days I don't have the time or desire to clip coupons. Plus, we get all of our newspapers electronically, so the Sunday coupons don't show up anymore. So I am trying a revised tactic to get the good stuff cheap.
We have two chain grocery stores around here. The one where we do 90% of our shopping, without searching for specials or coupons, has fair prices an most everything in the store. The Other Store must be a mob controlled deal. They have crazy stupid prices posted on every item. But if you give up your phone, email, address, Diver's License number, firstborn and the deed to your house, they grant you with a savings card. With the card you get to pay prices that are only 15% higher than our usual hang out.
But along with the stupid high prices and the dumb shopper's card, this store does loss leader items once a week. Things that are so cheap you come in for the sale and you end up buying lots extra.
But not this sucker. They kids and I got in, bought the five 'give away' items and left. 4 boxes of General Mills cereal for $6. 2 CASES of Dr Pepper for $9. 2 gallons of milk for $7 and steaks for $2 a pound. Guess what I am eating tonight!?!
The best part of the trip? This store tries to have all the bells and whistles for shopper convenience. So they have specially designed carts for the kiddies. Complete with a 7inch monitor showing Wonder Pets or The Backyardigans. So my kids? Silent. Not a peep. For 20 minutes. And unlike other stores where I have seen these carts, this store lets us use them AT NO ADDITIONAL CHARGE - cause nothing is free, right?.
Still, even though they kept my kids happy with their high dollar cart, I stuck to the game plan. I even walked back in to cash in a coupon I had left in the car. But it was worth $4, so the 2 minute walk was worthwhile. All tolled, the receipt for this morning's shopping/entertainment, $100.10. But we cruised out of there for a reasonable $51.80.
I can hardly wait until next Thursday's grocery ad...
And for the record? The shopper's card? I lied. Bum phone number, bad email addy. And I made up a fake home address. When I signed up, I "forgot" my driver's license that morning. Since then I have lost the card, but they let you use your phone number to access the savings. And I still remember that fake phone number, 12 years later.
We have been having wicked winds for the last two days. Last night, while we were playing in the backyard, I noticed that the new canopy over the swings was tearing at the corners. Last summer it took weeks for a small tear to work all the way across the canvas.Not this year.
First day of summer break and the playscape is closed for renovations. For the time being, at least until the winds of hell recede, I'll just take the canopies down and we'll have to limit our playscape time to early mornings and evenings.
Design of Version 3.0 will begin shortly.
At least the kids slept until 8. Did I tell ya that?
The beginning of an ode to summer, compliments of The Princess and The Talker:
On the first day of summer my children slept 'til 8.
Oh what a start to the day!
Don't tell my wife. Or I'll deny sleeping until 8:05.
The Boss Lady and I forgot about her family's unhealthy disposition with buying stuff through the mail and off of TV. And we let The Talker order a canteen. Off of the back of a Pop-Tarts box. Yep, quality parenting. I know.
It was supposed to be an exercise in money management and also we could show him that stuff you order might not end up as cool as you thought it, 6 weeks earlier.
But dang it, Pop-Tarts, you guys seem to have trumped our lessons.
First of all, when the boy went into his piggy bank to fork over the cash for his canteen, he was loaded. $5 didn't seem to leave much of a dent. So I took the rest of his money and filled up my car's gas tank. Not really, but that would have been cool.
Then, the wait was supposed to be 6 weeks or so. But I would bet we didn't send those proofs of purchase in any more than a month ago. Strike, two!
Finally, this thing was supposed to be junk. But the canteen is pretty cool. So I can't really go too far with trying to explain that he spent $5 on something that wasn't worth it. Especially since I want one now, too.
The Talker turned into a babbling goon when he saw it coming out of the box. Even now, he is sipping from the new canteen while he is eating a snack and watching a little TV. Maybe I'll steal it the next time I go work out at the YMCA.
Except for my new suit that I got in January, I have been living with one pair of dress pants for the last 6 months or more. Probably closer to a year, but they are pants, so I don't really care enough to keep track. All I know is I got fatter and my pants that I had worn to church for about 10 years did not fit any longer.
I could have dieted or worked out at the YMCA. But I decided that the pants were all worn out and probably out of style anyways, so I decided to lose the pants and keep the fat. Thus, I ended up with one pair of dress pants that fit after the fattening.
Tonight, I headed out to shop for some clothes. I mostly needed pants but shirts that aren't blue would be considered, too. At some point during the my "growth period" I started wearing blue shirts. And now I have a closet full of blue and little else.
I think I did pretty well. $109 and I brought home 3 pair of slacks and 3 new shirts. Evidently I am between sizes now. So I tried on every pair of pants in the store. Finally I decided to buy the bigger sized pants so that I can either get them altered a little or I might decide to continue super-sizing myself. Whichever is easier...
After I found the pants and two of the shirts, I was heading to the cash register. But like a siren's song, I was being pulled to the 30% off rack in the pack corner of the store. And when I got there, I broke a rule. I picked out a blue shirt. Actually, I think this shirt picked me. It was divine intervention or something.
So I bought The Greatest Shirt in the Entire History of the Universe. I barely made it into the house before I was showing my prize to The Boss Lady. She was speechless. I think she was duly honored to be in the presence of The Shirt. Yep, she was in awe.
Some guys might not be able to rock a shirt like this. But AtHomeDaddy is able and willing. Need proof? Here is The 2nd Greatest Shirt Ever. I wore to work today.
The 2nd Greatest Shirt Ever was another shirt that spoke to me. I was in the grocery store. Buying tortilla chips. And there he was, on a rack by the pharmacy. I grabbed that sucker and headed home. I was halfway home before I remembered the chips that I had not bought.
Feel honored. You have now seen greatness. Lucky me, I get to cruise town with my kiddos and these awesome shirts on a regular basis. For some reason, the wife never seems to be around when my awesomest shirts are with us...
One last thing. Can you believe I didn't spend even $15 on either one of these beauties? Sometimes greatness just comes to you.
The Princess and I have completed our first year of pre-school.
When we started, I was not sure we would make it all the way until December. But the idea of going to school kind of grew on her. And I think that she liked the fact that I was always around. For a girl who will hardly ever give me a hug at bed time, she always ran up to me on the playground and gave me the best hugs.
Also, I gotta say, it was a profitable day to be Mr. Mike. The parents take up a collection for end of the year gifts for each staff member. I ended up with a gift card to our favorite restaurant another to Home Depot and a stack of cash. If the Boss Lady asks, it was $37.54, OK?
The Princess and I blew off our sack lunch sammiches today and used some of that new found wealth to by a pizza. Don't tell the boy.
The Talker has school until next Thursday. Once he is done, you will have to come to the pool if you need to see us.
There are lots of things I can do. But a lot of those things would cause our entire family to starve within days if my salary depended on it. Like house painting. I can do it, but it takes nearly forever.
I can grow veggies in my garden, but I would have to sell each bean for like $1.35 if we were to make a living off of the land. I can make old trucks run. As long as looks and safety are of no concern.
I can cook. Barely. And if I went pro doing it, someone would really have to want to pay big bucks for pizza and mac and cheese.
Thanks to The Queen Mother, I can also sew. A little. Enough to make doll clothes with the assistance of a 4 year old? You betcha. Good enough to sell and live off of the profits? Maybe not.
The Girl and I set out this morning to whip up a new outfit for one of her dolls. The Princess worked the sewing machine foot pedal like a true seamstress. Any flaws in the stitch work or design are totally mine.
Just for the record, The Princess planned to make a Halloween costume. I talked her down to a nightgown for her doll, Emma. Which evidently was just on the edge of my abilities, since we had to make it twice. The first one wouldn't go over that baby doll's gargantuan melon.
The Princess slept 13 hours last night. She went to bed early, after an epic battle to the near-death over cleaning her room. Evidently she REALLY didn't want to clean her room. In the end, she won, since the room is still a mess.
But I'll take losing allllllllllllllllll day looooooooooooooooong if it leads to a child sleeping half a day.
I assumed this morning that she was starting to get sick. Since she finally woke up, though, she has acted like she feels fine and she has no fever.
So now we know 2 things. She isn't sick. Yet. And the room is still a mess.
Hey Father of Five. Remember those Dr Pepper prize lids? Well, I finally got around to entering a whole stack of codes from eligible Dr Peppers. And guess what?
We won. Yep. It was a big time prize, too. So which side do you want? After all, half of this digital wallpaper is yours, buddy.
Just another week or two and the veggie garden is going to be in full swing. I have been harvesting a handful of green beans every day for more than a week. Today, I picked the first tomato of the season and the first of our purple hull beans.
Today's bounty
Mint, onions from The Boss Lady's Grandma,
Dill, sage, green beans and lots of tomatoes
Purple hull beans from a neighbor
Caged tomatoes
Escaping tomatoes!
My baby watermelon
Irises from Mom and Dad's house
Caladiums from Aunt PearlLast year I built a frame that attaches over the playscape, so that we could shade the swings and a good portion of the fall zone. The idea was a success. But the tarp I used had to be re-shaped several times, after it stretched while holding lots of rain water.
Back then I bought a second tarp. Then I lost the second one. So we whittled away on the original design. By trimming and stretching the tarp, we made it through the entire summer with a shaded playscape for about $20.
The Boss Lady found the second tarp out in the garage last month. And we are now fully shaded again.
We made a few changes to the design this year. All the trimming has been done in advance. The Boss Lady hemmed all of the cut edges to help with unraveling, which was the final demise of design 1.3
Over all, the shade is smaller this year, but this is about the shape we ended up with last year. I also added a few brass grommets to the center line of the tarp, to combat the collection of water.
Canopy 2.0 is now online and ready to use, so come on over and have a shady swing.
Her Royal Highness, The Boss Lady, has invited the entire AtHomeFamily to come along on her Memorial Day Holiday Weekend quest. We will be heading out soon to go to the Scarborough Renaissance Festival. But proving that she might actually be the Court Jester, HRH, TBL has decided that it is a good idea to take 4 (four, yep, 2 squared) extra children with us.
Hopefully the dragon or the extra kiddos won't get the best of AtHomeDaddy, since The Talker still has a week of school and The Princess has another day or so to go until summer break. And Summer is when AtHomeDaddy really earns his keep around here.
Hope you guys have a great holiday. Drive safe and say "Thanks" to a member of the US Armed Forces if you get a chance.
Father of Five posted up the content of his MP3 player. And he asked what was in mine. If I could find it, it would look something like this...
About once a week The Princess and I go to eat lunch in the school cafeteria with The Talker. On a good/normal day, The Talker gets to pick one friend and we eat on the stage, so that all the other classmates can see us and be jealous.
Today was not a good/normal day.
The stage was closed in preparation for a 3rd grade performance tonight. So The Princess and I ate at the table with the rest of The Talker's class. And let me tell you, next time I think I'll just bail out. Leave the boy with his classmates and scram.
What a freakin' nightmare. The staff who supervise the cafeteria see an adult at a table and they assume that the adult (me) can handle whatever requests/questions/demands that 20 kindergartners can throw my way. Guess what? Some people might be able to. This guy? No chance. For one thing, I don't know the cafe rules.
After a third kid asked me for permission to go to the restroom, I gave up. I was trying to get them to ask someone who knows how things are supposed to run. But no adult was coming on that side of the room, so I just started saying "Yeah, sure. Whatever."
Chaos ensued. Which isn't that much different than a normal/regular day from what I have seen from my seat up on the stage. Still, I felt bad for being the guy who caused the noise and craziness.
The entire time we were eating, one of the classmates, whom I shall call Devil Child With the Loudest Mouth this Side of the Mississippi River, kept screaming demands at me.
"Open this! Now this! Go get me a new fork! I dropped this one."
But Devil Child With the Loudest Mouth this Side of the Mississippi River does not realize that I excel in ignoring rude little brats. So his yelling went unheeded.
Towards the end of the meal he started yelling "I am telling on you!" It took me a few times to realize that he was still talking to me. So I finally responded "Go for it. Maybe they will banish me from the cafe for all eternity"
Once a staff member finally came over to see why Devil Child With the Loudest Mouth this Side of the Mississippi River was shrieking at me, he pointed at me and told her "He hit me. That guy over there hit me."
She was obviously concerned, since she gave the type of response I had given all through lunch "OK, sure. Whatever."
That pretty much ended our nice relaxing meal in the school cafe. The Princess and I left pretty quickly after that. Devil Child With the Loudest Mouth this Side of the Mississippi River was still screaming that I had hit him. The Talker and most of his friends were laughing and I was mumbling to myself "...right in the throat if it would make you be quiet..."
Yep. School lunches with your kids. I highly recommend it. Time well spent with your progeny.
Just as long as the stage is open.
So The Boss Lady is now hiring her wonderful hubby out for general lawn maintenance. In other words, I have reverted to a 14 year old kid and will be mowing yards this summer.
A friend of the wife's is shelling out big bucks for her yard work. When my lovely bride was talking with her about it it must have gone like this:
"You pay how much? Mike will do it for half that... And he can start this week."
So I have a new mowing job a few blocks away. I also have a wife that seems to have a high level of skill in negotiations concerning how busy I should be.
Lucky me.
Actually, when I started this stay at home gig, I thought long and hard about having some flyers made up to see if I could steal away some of the neighborhood mowing. It seems like every family around here uses a different service. If I could have gotten 3 or 4 houses close by, it would have been easy cheesy. But like most of my million dollar ideas, that one never went too far.
Maybe it is time to revisit that idea.
Milk for breakfast? That is boring. Besides, we are out. Apple juice, orange juice, grape juice, blueberry juice, pomegranate juice? Yep, we are all out of those, too.
Cereal? Nope, got none of that.
Cheese toast? Sausage? Pancakes? Right. We are out of all of that stuff, also.
Turns out we are out of everything except half a bag of M&Ms (compliments of Father of Five) and a few snacks. Heck, we are even out of Dr Pepper.
Hopefully nobody from the state shows up at our breakfast table this morning. Otherwise they would take the kids. So what IS for breakfast? Pop Tarts and Kool-Aid of course.
But it IS grape Kool-Aid and they ARE strawberry Pop Tarts. So that counts for something, right?
First thing on the list this morning? Sponge Bob. Then dropping off the boy at school, where he can buy a nutritious lunch for $2. THEN straight to the grocery store. Where they sell donuts and Dr Pepper.
Which will make a mighty fine REAL breakfast, right?
This was one busy week. The Boss Lady and The Talker's school year is quickly winding down. The Princess and I only have another week or so before our summer break begins.
A quick recap of our week. The Boss Lady worked. The boy had school. Luckily, that storm passed us by without even disturbing a leaf on our trees.
The wife and kids hit the pool once this week. I skipped that trip because I was going to get the yard mowed. I got distracted and started working on another project before I moved to the back yard. But the front looks awesome.
The Talker's soccer season wrapped up this morning. We are planning to enjoy our re-captured Saturday mornings this summer. And since I was coaching the team, I imagine that the kids will be glad not to have to deal with Coach Mike early on Saturday mornings.
Marge hung out in front of the house all afternoon. The best news of the whole weekend, thanks to the wife, I spent the entire afternoon playing with the old truck. If it isn't raining tomorrow, I may drive the truck to church.
Tonight Law Talking Guy and I went out and ate crawdads. 3 pounds of 'dads and I am a happy customer. I was worried that we would not manage to fit in our annual MudBug feast this year. The rest of the two families hung out here at the house and ate chicken nuggets and mac n cheese. Which was probably a lot healthier that all those crawdads.
As you can see, it was a whole lot of nothing too exciting around here. Which is exactly how I like my weekends.
We just spent the best part of the evening huddling in the tub. No, The AtHomeFamily wasn't feeling especially close tonight. But we were under a Tornado Watch. People were calling in reports of a tornado touching down just a couple of miles away to the local news channels. So we hit the tub.
Houses around here, especially those built a 15-40 years ago, usually have a centrally located interior bathroom without windows. Lots of walls between the family and the storm is a good thing. The kid's potty room here fits that bill. So we hung out in there.
We were ready to pull The Talker's mattress over us if the storm actually hit. And the pets were all hanging close by, though I never actually brought them into the 6ft by 10 ft bathroom.
The storm passed us by without much more than a few sprinkles of rain. And so far it looks like most of the region was spared a direct hit. Hopefully that is the last of the excitement for the evening.
The kids were fine throughout. No one was too scared or upset by the change in beds. They managed to sleep through the whole thing. All the while sharing a bathtub.
Now believe me, I am not making light of tornadoes or severe weather. I have seen the destruction left behind first hand and it is not a joke. Besides, neither The Boss Lady nor I would risk scaring the kids unless it were really serious.I just thought that image of my family hunkering down together was nice. The fact that the kids trust us enough to snooze, even if we tell them to do it in a bathtub is pretty amazing.
All the while I was pacing from TV to TV watching the radar screens. Luckily, this storm did not cause serious problems around here and nothing more serious seems to be headed this way tonight.
The Boss Lady and I are pretty well prepared for severe storms. Still, it is good to double check once in a while. Here are some websites with good weather info.
I seem to have made the cut over at the Best of Blogs, Best Daddy Blog. Father of Five nominated me for this prestigious honor. Heck it must be high class seeing as they haven't even updated their graphics since last year.
FOF made the final 10, too. And he is my favoritests blogger EVAR. Of course, you start sending me packages of Dr Pepper and M&Ms and you can be my new best bloggy friend, OK? Or just vote this tripe to the top of the heap of Dad blogs and maybe The Boss Lady will throw us all a raging kegger nice little get together with finger sammiches and a punchbowl full of bathtub gin other stuff.
The mailman rang the doorbell a few minutes ago. I was assuming he was delivering a box of vacuum cleaner bags. Otherwise, he would have just stuck the mail in the box at the curb. But no. He was delivering a sugar buzz from on high. Or Minnesota. Either one sounds heavenly right now!
Thanks, Father of Five. I will enjoy and I might even share with the family, as you suggest. But no promises there, OK?
But along with the goodness that is the bounty of the North, we got a letter. From right here in Austin, TX. The address is just about a 20 minute drive from our house. And it was printed yesterday. Which is pretty good time for snail mail.
The IRS sent out this friendly reminder about the economic stimulus payment. And their math is exactly in agreement with the amount that we thought we would be borrowing from the future getting.
In fact, I KNOW the amount to be correct since the direct deposit prefund (Yeah, I made up a word. Feel free to use it) hit our account LAST WEEK!
Regardless of the IRS's ability to get the job done in a timely manner, I can still sit here and enjoy some afternoon 'nack of the highest order. Thanks again, Father of Five.
I should just lie and say it has been a few weeks since I recycled.
The Princess and The Pretty KittyI was struck by a co-worker this morning. Right in the face.
And the Boss Lady says I deserved it. But she wasn't there. You are on my side, aren't you?
Co-worker: So what did you and the kid's do to celebrate Mother's Day with your wife?
Me: Hey, it isn't my problem. She isn't my mother. If the kids wanted to celebrate with THEIR mom, then they should have come up with something.
I was giggling as I started to walk away. Then she hit me.
Luckily, it was a soft smack. A tap, really.
I was going to tell my co-worker about the 2, count 'em, two, vacuums AND the new blender that I got running this weekend, just in time for Mother's Day. But I was afraid she would break my jaw if I shared that info.
Just FYI, the new blender does a mighty fine job on the other stuff, too.
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